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wow listen to those precious words you hear less...

The monkey scenes are the bomb

Amazing convo ❤ thank you ✨

Destroyed, again.....

I gave attention. Intention. Investment. Got "i feel like your love is not genuine" at the end. 😅

After plenty of relationship struggles, my biggest hurdle is what you talk about at the 28 minute mark. I was just talking to my friends about how puzzling it is to determine where my needs, wants, and desires eclipse or conflict with my partners’ and vice versa. I fear it will be a lifelong dissatisfying struggle and it makes me think I am not really able to have a healthy relationship.

Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.

Wow she had to do every first step 😅

Great conversation! Learnt a lot from it, thank you 🙏

I didn’t know he was so funny 😂❤ where is this whole seminar posted?

My story with her is the following so if anyone has anything to say about it , tell me. She came to study for some months in my country ( she is from America and I'm in Europe ), and we met and started hanging out. After 2-3 dates , she decided, after talking with her friends of course, that she shouldn't get closer with me since she is leaving in two months and because her friends told her that she should be single since she got out of a long year relationship. We stop for some days and we talk again after i texted and went out again. I had started feeling things for her too but i knew it would have to stop after she had to leave. In that date , she told me that she kissed with someone when we werent talking and although we didn't have a relationship, I didn't like it . She started crying saying she was sorry and everything but I couldn't say anything either because like I said we weren't in a relationship. So i told her that we could continue hooking up and shit but nothing more I guess. After 2 days she decides AGAIN that we have to stop this because again her friends say that we shouldnt continue either and because she told them i made her cry and they said i was an asshole ( although it wasnt my fault really). I say fuck this , and we stop talking again. Buut, i texted her after a week and again she agreed to go out. After that , she said she didn't want to keep her self back and that she wants to be with me only since she has feelings..or so i thought. After 2 weeks, hanging almost everyday together and doing all kinds of things, we get in a relationship. We said that we wanted to keep it evn though if she left , and that i would come in America to work and be with her after some months. She agreed that she wanted to try this because she didn't want to lose me. Her crying almost every time thinking that she would have to leave me and everything made me believe that she wanted this . Aand after 4 days after she left , she decided that she wasn't ready for a relationship and that she wasn't sure of she loved me back , although she was saying it, and that she needed more time to say it and be more meaningful. So..we break up and we haven't talked since..i haven't sent anything and disappeared .. although i havent deleted her from Instagram. Im still thinking about her after a month now, and although i feel better than i was at the beginning, I still miss her and cant move on. Im still going to America but in a different state because i have family there . Any thoughts on this?

This is exactly what i needed to hear

This is deep & so true

I think it's also worthy to distinguish between intuition and instinct. So for instance, sensing that someone is not trustworthy might be more of an intuition. The way we react in a circumstance is more of an instinct. I would trust more my intuition than my instinct, although controlling instincts too much can also be detrimental. For instance, if your child is being a brat, your instinct may be to get angry and shout a bit, but you control yourself based on learned ideas, on your head, because you think you should not be violent at all. And then this may cause you more problems, because the child may learn much quicker to behave well if exposed to your natural reaction, but your rationality keeps them misbehaving and getting you more unconsciously angry and then acting out your anger in more subtle and destructive ways :)

You made me realize that my instinct is to repair it all by myself. As a child raised by a single mother of 2, with financial issues and stress, what I've learned is that no one will help me solve my problems or help me get what I need. So now in a trauma bond relationship I find myself trying to fix things all the time, even when he's the one breaking it and he's just leaning back or even going away and just demanding. This is the instinct that does not serve me anymore. I need to learn that in a relationship I am not the solely responsible for putting effort and problem solve.

I appeased.my bf too many times and hes learned to walk all.over.me..hes repeatedly insulted my intelligence and has called.me.stupid several.times. Ive finally blocked him and left this abusive behavior.

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They do commit but only to female virgins cause why would they settle for another man's leftover

Yeah I’ve hit a low point 😞

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What do you do if your guy loves you but he’s hooked on porn and girlie videos and photos and can’t seem to stop

I'm stuck in a trauma bond and I think from everything I have heard so far this has been the most eye opening to me. Ever since I have entered this relationship more than 2 years ago he's been constantly pulling away, ignoring my needs and feelings, and I've been accepting so much from him and compromising myself just to have this relationship. And now, when I look at everything, I can see how much I had to offer in this relationship, and how he's been a consistent taker devaluing me. And I think this will be the most important factor in helping me move on. Simply becoming conscious of what I have to offer and stop taking it for truth when he makes me feel like I am not enough and I need to work harder for him to lift a finger. Thank you so much.

Wait til she finds out that she can be single AGAIN. I thought I had it all figured out but here I am, going through a divorce at 33

I must say, you’ve been a true friend to me. Your talk have been very supporting in my difficult times with men

I am holding back from love because of having experienced narcissistic abuse as a child .And as an adult, I experienced personality clash ..So I experienced double trauma... 😢

you’re wrong. It’s the opposite. If someone said they’d do anything to be with me I’d take them back. Non chalantness and pretending to be ok is a turn off.

What a professional 👏 thank you, Matthew, for your hard work to help people with their emotional life struggles, your videos and inspiration for a better love life helped me so much 💚💯

How come we had sex first date we are married for 10 years now

"In a relationship, chemistry is necessary for a romantic relationship, but character is going be to be the foundation of a long-term relationship". I guess this is what I needed to hear to let him go. Millions of thanks, Matt, for your cutting through the noise.

Thanks Audrey - for being a gentle, kind & sweet host. Sabrina has a very hard & strong personality - I am not sure about her advice or views on relationships- as it’s based on her own projections of her own upbringing. It works for Sabrina now - because she is in a safe relationship with a partner that seems to have a huge bandwidth for her. But not all partner can hold up so long like this.

WOW.. I just happened upon this video which came up in my feed and it Really hit home, as I made these very mistakes after reconnecting with the love of my life who had left me and didn’t speak to me for 4 years. When we reconnected it was obvious from the get-go that there was still SO much love there, and for over a year it really seemed as if we were moving in a direction of dating again, so I did Everything I thought I “should” do to please her and be there for her, and lo and behold she blindsided me 10 days before Xmas saying she didn’t think she sees a future for us. In the meantime, I mostly ended up ignoring all the projects I’d worked on and built up While we she wasn’t in touch with me, paradoxically and precisely so that I might impress her with all of those projects. Lesson learne, That’s for sure!🤦🏻‍♀️

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I went through that! I obsessed over him allowed him to see me whenever he went into town. I knew he was always busy, then I chased him & it was painful

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Thanks so much

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Psychologist asking about Relationship= Here goes the PHD 🗑️😂. She should be giving the answers to other's, how irresponsible you were when are Studying 😂 And lady please Study= Philosophy & Sociology

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